Sunday, August 14, 2011

Is this a good story?

Honestly I would not carry on reading. If, for three pages, all that we heard about was her being a lifeguard I would put it down. Your character comes across as pretty whiny, and basically we are hearing about things that most readers wouldn't really care about. You should introduce your main plot as soon as possible instead of just rambling on about things which don't really matter.

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